seriously, dont even bother to read this... its just an outline for our vacation next week... because i am a neurotic list maker that has to have every little detail planned out.

• leave here tuesday afternoon around 1,
  arrive at hotel around 4:30 give or take depending on traffic. dinner will probably be the sizzler or something...
  
• wednesday morning, breakfast at the hotel followed by a day at the zoo. probably a picnic at the zoo for lunch, dinner is yet to be determined. After dinner family fun time in the indoor pool at the hotel
• thursday morning breakfast again at the hotel followed by a trip to the childrens museum and depending on the weather either a trip to the Gene Leahy Mall or the Joslyn Museum then eating at Spaghetti works and begining our trip home...

all in all a short vacation....? Yes. But i think that we will have a good time if we can manage to not kill each other. Jon and i have a habbit of fighting when we are in confined spaces for long. LOL. But i think if we can survive the drive up there then we will be ok. i am still trying to figure out the food situtation since we have never been up there before, but i have a few days yet to figure shit out. I have already booked the hotel so we are all systems go at this point. i am taking aidan out of his class on tuesday so we can get an earlier start and get checked into the hotek right around check in time so we can get the most of our money. [im just like that... and you should know it by now]

its been a while since i updated so here is the latest news....


Aidan is going to speech Therapy twice a week, and we are now enrolled is parents as teachers.. which i did not want to be a part of. but whatever. i hope that this speech therapy helps aidan communicate better. even i have a hard time understanding him a lot of the time.

a good friend of mine came home on R&R from Iraq, hes gone again now.. its amazing how much you can miss some one after they step back into your life.  i havent seen him in 3 years, and rarely talk to him on face book and shit, but he and i got to hang out twice while he was here, and its like as soon as he got on the plane to go back i started m issing him. He was my best friend in high school, and as far as i am concerned he will always be some one i care deeply about. I wish he would come home again for good.

i have also found myself missing a lot of my friends from the past... people i havent sopken to in years... sometimes its people i literally havent spoken to in 10 years. its funny how you start to think about your old friends and whonder if they are the same people. i miss them, they were all great people... some of them just made some mistakes that cost them everything.  i hope they are all ok.

we have decided to stop trying to get pregnant untill after the new year. i dont want a summer baby again, i cant afford to have all of our birthdays in the same month.  but its actually ok with me, right now we need to concentrate on aidan and getting him to speek clearly and shit. we will start trying again sometime around the first of the year.

i have give up on my evil grandmother. shes a bitch and i refuse to associate with her. i dont care about my inhairatance any more. money isnt everything. i HATE burning bridges but i feel like i have to at this point. she never has anything nice to say to me, and everytime i call her i end up feeling worse than ever. the last time i talked to her she pushed me over the edge by telling me i am an ungrateful little bitch who is just like my mother.  she has said that kind of thing many times before but for some reason i feel like this time needs to be the last. i can no longer subject myself of my son to the kind of anger and bitterness that she posesses. i dont understand why she is the way she is. and at this point i dont really feel the need to understand her any more. in a way i feel sorry for her, because she keeps pushing every one away and one day she will just be left with the dogs she loves so much. i wonder tho.. if she realizes that those dogs will eat her soft tissues after she dies and no one finds her for weeks because she has pushed every one away.... thats something to think about. ha ha ha

i am working on keeping myself calm at all costs... i am meditating daily and trying to relearn how to breathe. its important for me to stay calm because i dont like how i get when i get stressed and angry.  i yell and throw shit, and that is not who i want to be.

this has become much longer than i expected when i started, so i am going to leave the rest for another post, its time for me to go on duity anyways, aidan is up and we need to get ready to go to lunch with the  good grandma. lol


to all of you who read this, i wish all of you a blessed day.